Amazing You,

How’s the year panning out for you?

How are your 2021 resolutions (If you made any) going thus far ?

And if you didn’t, that’s fine, I totally understand.  

Because sometimes your new year resolution could be to not make any resolution. 

Your new year resolution could be to just BE!

Live and breathe.

And it’s very much okay to make your new year resolution much later in the year or even in the middle of the year!
 A popular proverb says and I quote:- ‘when you wake up, is your morning’.

In other words, when your light dawns, your day begins (figuratively). 

Just ensure though that you are not spending your time lounging in bed, sipping cocktail and watching life. Be sure you’re in bed because you’re resting or healing.

This year is going to be really fast!  It was just about 2 minutes ago when we just said Happy New Year and boom! it’s the end of May already.

Honestly, time is running. But hey! You don’t have to run with it. Or feel pressured that you haven’t started anything yet. 

It’s okay to make some movement and by all means do, but if you’re not at a place where you can make meaningful movement, commit to your healing and focus on that so you can spring back and get back on track because, we need to move.

And if you’re already hitting the goals, keep at it. Just ensure you move at your pace and take some rest when you need to and after you’re rested, pick up again.

In January I had a burnout. I talked about it in an earlier post but i want to share another perspective to it today.

So, I had already hit some of my goals for the year but I was exhausted. And in the middle of the exhaustion,  I was still trying to act strong till I had to sit down and acknowledge the truth.

I was exhausted. And burnt out.

I had been on a 4 week marathon building about 4 websites, a magazine, massive contents and writing books, in addition to being a wife, mama, daughter and sister. 

I was tired, and angry! I was wondering if it was all worth it.

You see, exhaustion has a way of making you disillusioned. Suddenly,  you start to think that everything you believed for, the life you longed for and worked towards, isn’t possible. 

Exhaustion makes you want to creep back into your hole and focus on surviving instead of thriving. 

I was tired and I knew it. 

We’re a generation that gets some kicks from getting things done but sometimes we forget that there is the skill to getting things done and there is the spirit of getting things done.

What I mean is this: There is no need ticking off a ‘to-do’ list of something that ordinarily should be done in a more meaningful way, but you rushed through it because you’re trying to do so much and you just need to tick it off as done!

An example is rushing through our devoted communion time with God just to tick our mental or physical register that we’ve prayed long and satisfy our religious conscience. Trouble is, when we really need the strength that the prayer should provide, we won’t find it because we didn’t dig deep, we only went shallow.

God would rather we spend a meaningful 15 minutes with Him than a rushed 30 minutes.

Another is reading. We all want to say we’ve read 100 books by December 2021.

Amazing!

But our lives stay the same because we hardly remember what we read and/or not implementing because we didn’t take the time to draw a parallel between what we read and our lives.

How about doing a job or an assignment and rushing through it only to have to do it again because we didn’t do it well or putting up with a shabby work because we don’t have time to redo it.

Then those moments when we’re working on something or catching up on the phone and we make our kids repeat themselves 5 times because they are talking to us but we can’t hear them; we’re distracted.

We fill up our to-do list with 1000 items because well, maybe we’ll get some robotic powers during the day to execute them :)

I wish there were no effects to living like this but alas, there is! Because as we water down our concentration, our brain starts to get used to the idea of us living a life that is not focused. 

So the brain knows that you typically don’t give your full attention to a thing and you do more than one thing at a time, ALL the time. So when you’re doing just one thing, your brain starts to look for a second and maybe third thing to add to what you’re doing cos hey! ‘Here, we do more than one thing at a time even if our attention isn’t focused on it’.

There are some times you NEED to do more than one thing to get things done but there are times you need to focus on just one thing and do it well.

But your brain doesn’t know the difference because you’re doing a whole lot EVERY time.

So you’re reading a book and at the foot of the page, you realise you can’t remember what you read on that page because your mind was everywhere but on what you’re reading.

And you maybe have to read the page again..but you’ve lost time.

There’s power in focus and this is a WHOLE message. 

But I’ll paraphrase the message by saying that doing a few things very well is better than doing a lot with mediocrity. 

Take this truth from an ambitious and multi-tasking human like me, I love to load my lists and tick off stuff but I’m learning that it’s not in the amount of things I do, it’s in the quality of the things I do; the 20% that makes the difference and you know what, alot of times, those relevant things that make the difference aren’t much.

They might not fill your to-do lists but they’ll help you become what is in your to-be list:- the list that describes the life you want to live and the person you want to become.

My charge to you today is to disconnect from the chatter and noise of what social media and influencers say you life should look like. They did not create you and even though they have a great sense and an idea of how a successful life should be, God has your own ultimate blueprint, especially if you’ve been stressed out and running battery low.

Disconnect and find your way back to God’s throne room, take a long hard look at your life and lay it before Him and ask Him to help you eliminate the clutter, even the ones you thought you couldn’t do without.  And ask Him to help you live your days more meaningful.

When you do that, your life will truly start to make sense.  That doesn’t mean it will be a merry-go-round because God will stretch you by calling you out of your comfort zone so you can build your capacity, do more and become more. Abundant fruitfulness happens on the stretch.

But you won’t be stressed because He will not give you more that you can bear. Stress happens when you try to do more than your capacity can carry.

Skills in a task are important. The act of doing a thing is important but it’s the spirit with which you do the task that makes the difference, making your work stand out.  That’s why two people can do same thing but get different results. One is an act(skill), the other is an art(spirit). One is usually done to cross it off a list and move on, the other is done with purpose and intention. 

Make your life an art; operate from a place of peace and focus, purpose and intention. 

I pray for you today that God will fill you with the wisdom you need to know what is relevant and what is extraneous, in every season of life that you are in, so you can focus on what truly matters per season and live your days more bright, more energized and more meaningful. 

I leave you with this
Make a careful exploration of who you are and the work you have been given, and then sink yourself into that. Don’t be impressed with yourself. Don’t compare yourself with others. Each of you must take responsibility for doing the creative best you can with your own life.
Galatians 6:4-5 (The Message Version)

Have an amazing God-defined week ahead 

Love, light and laughter. 
Aijay

Sometime early this year, I had a deadline to meet that ended up taking much more of my time than I had planned so I literally worked on the task for three days straight.

By the time I had gone past the second day, I realised I wasn’t studying at midnight like I usually do and of course I told myself God would understand, it’s the season but by the third day, I was in a place of dire starvation but not from physical food. 

I wasn’t feeding my Spirit.

You see, I was reading my Bible a little here and there but my day to day demands require that I not only feed on God’s Word very well for myself, I feed to the overflowing because someone or something might draw on me. But here I was, just scratching by and managing, and I could feel that weakness inside that had nothing to do with my physical body. 

At that point, I knew something had to give so I don’t give.

Haha

It’s amazing all the parts of ourselves we have to take care of, to be in one piece; body, soul and spirit.

Before we go on, let’s look at an analogy.

Imagine that your life is a house and your dreams are the appliances in the house. And imagine that you live in my country Nigeria where power isn’t too stable and you have to get a standby generator and depending on the capacity you want, there is 1KVA, 2KVA , 3.5KVA and up to 100KVA generator and more, so you can keep your life moving when power goes off.

Now Imagine that you have this big deep freezer you bought to keep your foods fresh and when you went to buy a generator, you got a 2kva generator hoping it will sufficiently ‘carry the load’ of your deep freezer.

I know you’re prolly smiling now. You know the answer.

We all do.

Kolé werk

It’s not possible.

How can it even be? Even if the generator comes on by any miracle, it will have this really low sound like it’s rumbling, more like complaining – ‘Aunty madam or uncle Oga why you put his Kain load for my head’. Plus the deep freezer won’t come on. (If you can think of other things that will happen when the freezer is switched on, please hit reply and let me know. But please finish the post first )

Haha

Ok. Enough of the joke.

But hey, I’m serious.

Wait. how did we get here?

Oh I remember. I was talking about how I got hungry..in my spirit.

So while keeping this analogy in mind, let’s head back to my story.

Having identified my challenge, I promptly worked on my schedule and created time for what matters – The Word of God, all the while wondering why my spirit couldn’t bear with me for a few days.‍  

As I sat down to study and feed my spirit, I heard the words – ‘Do not stop feeding what fuels you’

And like a rushing wind, it all came to me.

‘I’m a spirit being. I operate from my inside. My spirit is what keeps me and enables me function, live and thrive. But my spirit itself needs to be fed to do it’s work and what my spirit feeds on is not amala, it’s the word of God. ‘

And it is same for you, believing you’re born again. (If you’re not, write to me please and we can talk about it)

Do not stop feeding what fuels you.

I have dreams. Big ones. But if my spirit isn’t fit enough to sustain me, I can’t do much and I can’t go far. And as much as physical and emotional fitness is key, spiritual fitness is actually more important. 

And that is where the generator analogy comes in.

Some of us are carrying around ‘2KVA generator powered spirit’ and we have 100KVA dreams and we’re wondering why we aren’t making progress

Sis & Bro. Tiz not the village pipo o. They are innocent this time.

It is your spirit that you haven’t pumped with the kind of food it eats.

You need to be fuelled but only a well-fed spirit can fuel you.

Only a well fed Spirit can sufficiently carry you from season to season.

By all means you still need a healthy body and energetic mind and we will come to that in a bit. But life begins from your inside and till you get it clear there, you will be dragging yourself around on the outside.

Now you might ask, ‘Aijay I know people who are doing amazingly well but they aren’t born again. Let’s leave this church matter abeg.’

I agree. For the first part of the comment not the second.

But you see, these people you’re talking about are not born again (like we just agreed) so they definitely don’t have kingdom-minded dreams like you.

They aren’t Christians so the enemy isn’t so scared that they will partner with God through their dreams to draw someone to Christ. The devil knows that whatever good they do ends there. No one will be invited to church or be told that Jesus did this and He can do it for them too

In other words, they aren’t a threat to the enemy.

BUT. YOU. ARE.

Copy that?

You are. A threat. 

You are a risk to hell because when you become successful, God can use your success to draw men to Himself. 

When you partner with God and do well, you become a light and people will want to know Who helped you..and of course they’ll know God in the process.

You’re going to take more people upward with you than someone out here who ain’t born again and is so successful.

You’re a risk factor to hell

And that’s why the enemy won’t fold his hands and watch you do well. 

That is why if you aren’t paying attention to what you should be paying attention to, the enemy is taking you more seriously than you take yourself.

But what is the connection between this and that?

The connection is this: The only effective weapon we have against the enemy is God’s Word and for that Word to get into our life, we need to pass it through our spirit.

Do you get it now?

Infact, can we have a heart to heart roundtable discussion here? Cos I feel like we are all on this table, me inclusive.

Like we’re busy. So busy our spirits are getting bushy..with weeds.

We’re trying to make a life and in the process, we forget to live. Truly live.

This is 2021 and we’ll make a difference guys. We will.

But we will need to start focusing on what truly matters

Yea? Yes.

I’m going to also say that feeding what feeds you isn’t for your spirit alone. It’s definitely for your spirit first but there are other parts. Like taking care of relationships that light your inner fire.

Consuming relevant information that helps you grow.

Eating healthy foods that keeps you strong.

Handling your money a little better so it can multiply and be available for extra deeds

Fill in the gaps for yourself. You know what fuels you in other ways.

But first, pay attention to your spirit

I wish I could go on but I just realised I’ve passed my word count for my posts and I’m trying to get better at writing shorter mails. I’m not sure how that is panning out though 

But do you see the picture now?

It is some serious business.

And I’m not talking reading 10 chapters a day. That is not sustainable if you’re a busy professional. 

I’m talking sitting down with your Bible and an open heart and asking God to teach you, and if a verse of a Scripture is all you can do in thirty minutes, meditating and getting it into your heart on a daily basis, it’s enough.

I’m talking a real and practical approach to studying God’s Word that will stretch you but will still be sustainable for you. 

I’m talking about writing some verses on a sticky note to meditate on throughout the day or setting phone alarm reminders at intervals, to excuse yourself from the busyness of the day and go somewhere private to declare God’s Word for even 3 minutes.

Sometimes it is not really in the length of time, it’s in the heart you put into it. And sometimes, it’s both.

Truth is, the more effective you want to become, the more you have to make time for God’s Word. 

Get all the knowledge you can for your field or area of expertise because you need that edge to excel. But never rely on that knowledge alone. There is a God Factor.

And maybe if you can’t do much during the week, you can have a weekly word retreat during the weekend. Fight if you have to, but make sure you make it happen

There are different ways to do this but your heart has to be in it first. 

Do you understand?

So my charge to you this week is to get into the middle of your own life and make your life work. What you need to move your life forward isn’t outside of you, it’s on the inside of you and you need to pay attention to it.

I pray for you today that the light of God’s Word illuminating your heart will always exceed the light of men shining on you, and that you will not only show people the way to a great life, you will also live a great life.

As usual, I leave this with you

Let the Word of Christ —the Message—have the run of the house. Give it plenty of room in your lives. 
Colossians 3:16a MSG

And this

“Now I’m turning you over to God, our marvelous God whose gracious Word can make you into what he wants you to be and give you everything you could possibly need in this community of holy friends.
Acts 20:32 MSG

You go on and have a fruitful and amazing God-defined week ahead.

Lots of love, light and laughter!

Aijay.

The year has been panning out nicely and it’s been a mix of excitement and exhaustion. I’m a little behind on my goals but I have decided that I am a human and not a robot so it’s okay. And even though the Holy Ghost empowers me, even God rested so I have to rest to.

Yes? Yes  

You see, I’m a very ambitious child of God and I get kicks from plenty to-do lists and goals achieved but I have also learnt to take the breaks i need when I do, like i did pretty recently.

I decided long ago that I might want to act all smiling before everyone and pretend everything is fine but I would never lie to myself. Not even in naming it and claiming it, I won’t. 

If something was twisted in a way it shouldn’t be, I’ll tell myself the truth and focus on fixing it.

That doesn’t mean I will confess negative. No. But I’d like to identify what is wrong so I can seek specific solutions for it.

So if I need help, I won’t wait till I’m on the floor, I’ll ask. 

If I feel uncomfortable with something,  maybe a relationship or with a person, I won’t sweep it under the carpet, I’d like to identify what could be wrong and discuss with the person if possible.  But I won’t ignore it hoping it will go away.

For me, the exhaustion wasn’t welcome because I had some goals to crush, I still do. But I had to tell myself the truth so I don’t break down. And this decision to be true to my self and not take on more than I’ve built capacity for at the moment, got me thinking on something I have discovered in our generation: It seems to me that we are a generation that generally don’t like to say the truth to ourselves. We often lie to ourselves.

Sometimes it’s because of fear. Other times it’s the desire to impress.

Sometimes it’s because we’re living life very fast and crushing goals that we don’t stop to listen to our deepest feelings.

And at other times it’s the misguided religious conception that you have to fake it till you make it.

Or maybe you want to ‘blindfold’ your heart to the truth so you can indulge in your desires and not feel guilty.

Whichever it is, we’d rather put up a false appearance than acknowledge what we’re going through. We’d rather keep a plastic smile than admit something hurts or is wrong. We’d rather paint a situation to suit our desire than see it for the colour it really is. 

We’d rather live a lie

And I get it. You can’t trust everyone with your heart. I get it. Even Jesus didn’t take the praises of men to heart because He knew what a man’s heart was like. 

That’s why I’m not asking that you tell the world. I’m only asking that you tell yourself – the truth.

Learn to come home to yourself and accept the truth for what it really is

Even if you can’t let anyone in, let yourself into your own heart, tell yourself the truth and attend to yourself.

Pay attention to you.

Let me give you a few examples:

You have noticed your salary always finishes before the end of the month and you tell yourself it’s because you’re underpaid.

Honey, that’s not the reason.

Truth is, how you spend 1000 is how you’ll spend 1000000, prudently or carelessly. If you can’t handle what you have now well, you can’t handle what you’re looking to earn either. You need to tell yourself the truth – my money game is not good- and work on it.

You have exams you’re scheduled for and you’re giving priority to other things and then the time for the exam draws closer and you feel pressured and blame everyone but you. Honey,  wake up and smell the coffee.

You know you shouldn’t eat junk. You know it gets you tired. But you splurge on it and expect to wake up strong and active the next day.  Plus you’re not expecting to add weight. 

You know weightloss is 70% what we eat right?

You are close to a colleague at work and the platonic lines are getting tinier. You’re crossing the lines but you’re still telling yourself – he’s just a friend. And you’re married. Ahh!

You are an ambitious visionary going somewhere to happen. And you have a strong picture of your future but you haven’t sat down to draw up a strategy. 

You’re a Christian and you’re hoping to be a multi-influential personality and you want to do so without engaging God’s Word. You want to be successful as a Christian without playing your part.  That’s a strong spirit of deceit at work because as long as you’re a Christian,  the devil will fight you.  You need to stay awake!

You have some funny dreams at night and it’s  beginning to bother you. If you’re grounded enough in God’s Word, stand your ground and run the devil off. If you don’t have that confidence yet, that’s okay.  Reach out. Or start building confidence in God’s Word aggressively because the yoke will be broken when you’ve fed fat on the Word  of God.

Life is really simple. Let’s not get it complicated.

Year 2021 has just started and I believe you’ve made a decision to protect your peace like we talked about last week. 

To that decision I ask that you please add another- a decision to be true to thyself.

Like a famous person once wrote: “To thy own self be true.”

This mantra has helped me and kept me from getting into things I had no business being in.

It has helped me keep touch with my core so I can live from inside out. 

I can live an increasingly authentic life because I’ve learnt to stop and take count,  introspect, ask questions and really look at situations. 

It will help you know your strengths and grow them. And it will help you know your weaknesses so you don’t tempt yourself.

You will know what you can handle and what you can’t,  and acknowledge the gap so you can fill it up.

You won’t have to try to be what you’re not. Or live in false rhythms because you’re trying to be perceived in a certain way.

It doesn’t mean you won’t be disciplined.  It means you’ll be intentional. 

And it means you’ll start to operate from a place that is truly yours, as you grow to become all God has called you to be.

Authenticity is beautiful

Making a decision to be among the few who own up to tell themselves the truth will probably be one of the best decisions you’ll make this year because it will help you build a life that is truly authentic, something that is rare these days.

I pray for you today that the strength and grace to look inwards and grow your life from the inside out, will rest on you. And that you will from this time to thyself, be true.

I leave you with this: 

Keep vigilant watch over your heart; that’s where life starts. Don’t talk out of both sides of your mouth; avoid careless banter, white lies, and gossip. Keep your eyes straight ahead; ignore all sideshow distractions. Watch your step, and the road will stretch out smooth before you. Look neither right nor left; leave evil in the dust.
Proverbs 4:23‭-‬27 MSG

You have an amazing God-defined week.

God bless you
Aijay

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Pss: Forgive me for any typo errors you might see.
 
Psss: Have you checked out this website www.styledbyabba.com? You should if you haven’t 

Pssss: Sending you love, light and laughter

How has 2021 been for you so far? 

Some might say we just crossed the 1/3rd mark of the year so it’s somewhat early to judge.

Well, I’d say that whatever you decide to do, make up your mind from now to have an unshakeable disposition of peace towards the year.

Last year shook alot of folks to the core. There were questions, fears, unrest, deep concerns, lots of speculations etc. But if you observe closely, you’d see one theme underlying all events – the loss of peace. 

All around people were going through stuff mostly covid-related and social-issues-related, amidst other things.
 
Unfortunately,  without peace, there’s so little you can do. 

Peace is a mighty force. 

Peace gives you the clearheadedness and inner strength you need to proceed. 

Maybe that’s why it was a primary target because alot of folks came into 2020 (last year) pumped to pursue their dreams especially after the ten year challenge. And the decade 2020 was a little different than 2010 because social media wasn’t so pumped then as it is now. 

So we had alot of people showcasing their success so far in ten years and the rest of those who didn’t have much success to show, swearing that come 2020, they will do their own bit. 

No more dulling. 

People were charged, inspired and challenged and 2020 was going to be the year of great unveiling. 

That must have really scared the devil

Here comes 2020 and just when some folks  were waking up and gearing to unleash, a little bit of hell was unleashed and till now, the effects are still showing.

But this is 2021 and even though there might be alot of healing for you to do, depending on the level of loss or unrest you had, I’m here to implore you not to give up on your dreams and the one way you can achieve your dreams is to ensure nothing steals your peace this year. 

This year, guard your heart and pursue your peace.

You see, like I said, 2020 came innocent but the enemy threw in a curve that sent alot of us falling and with it went our peace, focus and joy.

But 2020 has gone. Thank God for it.

This is 2021 and we just cannot afford to play tag along again. 

We can not.

‘It’s too early to decide’ some folks have said.

Maybe. 

But you can decide right now that whatever happens in the year, you will do all you can to protect your peace.

If it means staying off news both on TV and social media for a while, then do so.

If it means getting off groups where all they share is bad news, who is sick or dead, where they are fighting etc, please do.

If it means pressing ignore button on some events or happenings around you, please do.

If it means getting a lot of healthy and well-scripted comedy skits and watching them whenever you feel unhappy, please do.

Maybe its staying off the phone or not calling some people

If there is a relationship that steals your peace, it might be time to hand it over to God and take some steps back because truth is, there is only so much you can handle, You need to deliberately guard your peace this year.

What this means is that you minimise your arguments, fights and disagreements. 

Sometimes you just agree to disagree so peace will reign, especially in matters that aren’t that important.

It means you identify what is really important and what is not so you know what to focus on.
 
It means you don’t react in every situation or give your opinion to everything.

It means you gauge your tolerance level for bad news and deal with yourself accordingly.  Do not expose yourself to news, environments and stuff that will drain and drown you.
Just because your neighbour can hear bad news all day and still go swimming doesn’t mean you can handle it. And it doesn’t mean there’s something wrong with you, it just means you’re differently wired.

It might mean that you forget about what you think people think of you and focus on your life and moving forward

Whatever it is for you, fill in your blanks. 

You might not even know all it means for you now but commit to monitoring your emotions and taking note of situations that steal your peace,addressing them and documenting the appropriate response to them that will preserve your peace.

Because you see, 2021 is pregnant for everyone. But you can only deliver your own when you have the peace of mind, focus and inner strength you need to pull through.

We’re not sure what will happen in 2021 but we’ve made up our mind ahead of time to preserve our peace no matter what.

And I’d say that the most important part of preserving our peace is setting it firmly on God’s Word. Thats the way forward and the way is sure.

Bury God’s Word in your heart and your responses to life will be more peaceful.

You can start by commiting to reading a chapter of the Bible, preferably new testament, just one chapter and writing down one thing, just one thing you learnt. 

If you’d like to get a nice new journal with a biro you love or use an ejournal, by all means please do. Or just get a journal you can write in.

The important thing is that you do it.

Surely that’s not too much is it?

See, I know we’re busy but we’ve got to make time for what will keep us alive and strong so we can enjoy the fruits of our labour.

2021 will be a truly great year that might still have curves and twists..but the level of greatness it will be for you inspite of the curves and twists, depends on your ability to focus on birthing.

Remember a pregnant woman guards her baby by guarding her lifestyle. 

This year, guard your dreams by guarding your heart and peace.

Guard your heart. Guard your peace
Change your lifestyle.  Change the Game 

I pray for you that the God of peace will fill your heart this year and no matter what you hear or encounter, His peace will stand strong like a mighty oak in your life.

I leave you with this

Let the peace of Christ keep you in tune with each other, in step with each other. None of this going off and doing your own thing. And cultivate thankfulness. Let the Word of Christ—the Message—have the run of the house. Give it plenty of room in your lives. Instruct and direct one another using good common sense. And sing, sing your hearts out to God! Let every detail in your lives—words, actions, whatever—be done in the name of the Master, Jesus, thanking God the Father every step of the way.
Colossians 3:15‭-‬17 MSG

Cheers to pursuing what gives us peace this year and beyond

Sending you love, light and laughter 
Have an amazing God-defined rest of the year 2021

God bless you
Aijay

It’s amazing how a new year can make one feel renewed, refreshed and ready to do some mighty new things for God. I’m so grateful for every goal achieved and success recorded last year and I’m already eager and expectant, looking forward to greater things this new year.

Almost everyone welcomes the new year with joy and expectations. I personally think having Christmas and New year in one breath of a week, is not only divine and phenomenal, it’s amazing. From the celebrations of Christmas with the beautiful season of harmattan/winter that accompanies it…right up onto the new year. Heaven planned this one, – a perfect combo.

It’s going to be an amazing year and I hope you’re looking to partner with God and make this year great. No matter what has happened in the past, you deserve a great year ahead because of John 10:10b – Jesus came to give you life and give it to you ABUNDANTLY. If you’re continuosly living a life that’s nothing to write home about, it’s time to make a change and a drastic one at that. And in the light of new year resolutions and awesome plans that grace seasons such as this, I just thought to share a few points that can help you make this year extra special, for you, so you don’t experience in 2019, what you experienced in 2018. Your life can be better, it all depends on your choices, starting today.

So shall we..?

1. Let God be at the very centre of your existence- your centre is the very core of you as a person and at that core is a God-shaped vacuum that can only be filled by God. So you have to let God be central in your life, right at the very middle of your life and in all the decisions you make. Don’t make choices without God and don’t fight your battles without Him. When you win, celebrate with God, when you face challenges, handle them through God. Live in 2019 with God at the very centre of everything and 2019 will be so phenomenal for you

2. Prioritize your focus- Know what is in God’s heart concerning you and go after it with all your heart. Azzin ‘die’ there. Give it your all with ruthless abandon. Determine what you want to achieve in 2019, ensure it lines up with God’s agenda for you and then, make it your priority. Your priority affects everything you do in life -your choices, your words, your belief, where you go, even how you dress, everything! Therefore, the best way and in fact the only sure way to achieve what you desire is to give it laser-focus and to do that, you’ll need to keep that dream before your eyes everyday and in your heart, praying for it, at all time. Know what is important in your own life and go after it with all your heart. No half measures. If it is important, you will make it important. Don’t act or sleep like you have plenty time. Create plans that will help you achieve your goals. Pursuits translate words to actions, thoughts to visible steps and imaginations to doable plans. Tell yourself continually that this year, you will be focussed in everything you do and every morning you wake up, determine the goals for the day and with deliberate intention, FOCUS, EXECUTE and FINISH

3.Your time must pay you and it must grow you- Make sure your time pays you and grows you. Be extremely intentional about that. Spend your time wisely. Know what to DO and when; know what to DELEGATE and when; know what to DEFER and when; and know what to DELETE and when. Your time is precious and as long as 2019 looks, we have just 8,760 hours innit. That means that you need to have value for every time you spend, even when you spend that time having fun. Your time must create assets for you, not liabilities. So I beg you, don’t waste your time in 2019. If a conversation won’t help your 2019 focus, gracefully disengage. Help yourself in 2019. Always ask yourself if what you’re currently giving your time to will yield you value? How much value does your engagements bring you? If that television isn’t contributing positively to your destiny, maybe it’s time you cut it down. If that thing is making you more afraid than courageous, cut it off! In essence, make wise use of your time. It’s your currency. Manage your time wisely, spend your time well. Finish what you have started.

4 Audit your relationships – There are four things you should do to your relationships this year because you will ultimately become like the person or persons you associate with.

– RENEW- Look at your circle of relationships and prayerfully consider those you should renew. Ideally, those that fall into this category might not be much. God comes first. Then your family. And divinely orchestrated covenant relationships. I don’t know what this list would look like for you but prayerfully assert who they are and make moves to keep these relationships refreshed and renewed.

REVIEW. You might need to review some relationships in your lives , especially those that have lost their trajectory. Some others too, you might need to review for upgrade. Some relationships no longer serve a good purpose in your life anymore. Maybe it’s a relationship that it’s season has expired or a friendship that has gone off course. Now, this doesn’t mean you dump your friends and break your relationships anyhow but deep in your heart, you know when something isn’t just working anymore and you need to move on. You know when the centre is broken and can no longer hold. its okay to try to work on your relationships and make it better. That’s great. But I’m talking about those ones that are killing you slowly. It’s time to review and REDUCE the relationship and please do so with no sentiments. Remember they won’t be there when it’s time to answer to God for your life on earth. Reducing does not mean they become strangers or you stop talking to them, it means you reduce the time you make available for the relationship and guard your heart seriously, with them. It means it no longer takes up a huge chunk of your time. Why should it? When it’s not adding to you, instead it’s making you sad and upset and angry continually. Reduction can also be in varying degrees. Some you need to reduce by some notches, others can be a few more and some have to be reduced to the barest minimum, maybe because you just have to have some kind of interaction with them frequently – for example a colleague at work. For these people, guard your heart in those brief moments of interactions so you don’t leave the conversation feeling funny again. Again I reiterate, reducing does not mean malice and does not mean you don’t act in love towards them. No. It just means you reduce the attention you give to it. Whenever they come around you, let them feel the warmth of Jesus radiate to them through the love you show them but know the boundaries.

There are also relationships that you know are Godsent but somehow you have not paid attention to them. This year, review and upgrade, create space in your life for what will add to God’s purpose for you

REMOVE- For those relationships you already told yourself won’t follow you into 2019. You know them, God has been cautioning you about it and you promised yourself that this year, you’re cutting off, it’s time keep that promise to yourself.

Your relationship circle is a mirror of what your future is like. Think about the kind of conversations you guys talk about. What do you focus on. Don’t let anymore make you mediocre because they want to be your friend. Choose friends by purpose not by pocket, including mentors, peers and mentees.

5) Build your capacity. Read good books and consume good content. You can only bless and give from the abundance that is within you so always add to that ‘abundance’.

6)Forgive. Forgive. Forgive. Forgive- everyone including you. No one is perfect and things are not always as serious as it seems so let go and ask God to heal your heart and take the hurt away.

Finally. Leave it all in the past. You failed God. You failed yourself, you messed up. You did it baaad! Whatever it was that happened, leave it in the past. Don’t let the memories of yesterday be stronger than the creative juices of today. Goes both ways, both for good and bad memories. Whatever it is, leave it in 2019. Even if it’s this year that it’s happened in already, azzin the year has not started and you’ve ‘commited errors’ already, ask God for mercy and drop it at the cross.

You might have an achilles heel, an area of weakness you’ve been trying to overcome . Yes I know people say you have to be a certain way to be used but the last time I checked, God uses willing hearts, not ready-made lives. This is not to say you shouldn’t live a life of purity and holiness but when you have tried but keep failing, drag yourself and your mess to the One who knows you and understands what you’ve been through. He knows deep down you want to serve Him but it’s tough. See, that person beside you won’t get it because they don’t know your struggle. But God does and He’s willing to help. There are some issues that can only drop off in the place of intense focus on God. When you’ve tried and you’ve failed, take it to God’s presence. If you started from there in the beginning, it would have been long gone by now. But it’s not too late now. Don’ t allow your mess or weakness stop you from serving God, instead, intensify your devotion in the place of prayer. Let your words express your heart to God, telling Him stuff you’ve not been able to tell Him by your actions because of the weakness you’ve had. Never joke with your altar. Pour fire there everyday. Keep it burning. Stay in place- stay in God’s presence. Every morning bring your sacrifice of worship. It’s called sacrifice because it might not be easy but we keep doing it EVERY DAY. Someday you’ll find that the struggle you used to have, you’ll have no more and the place of prayer has become a wholesome delight to you.

And it’s a wrap. Hope these points are succinct enough for you to pick what hits your spirit and run with it this year.

Here’s wishing you a super duper amazing fruitful GOD-DEFINED year and you bet! I’ll be praying for you seeing as you’re part of my blog-family

God bless you!!

Aijay Ufomadu

… live awake

Recently, on my way back from work, I decided to do a quick stop at the supermarket and pick a couple of things. I had just closed from work and I was looking forward to getting home, most especially because I was hungry; really hungry. But if I didn’t buy what I needed, Saturday would be the next time and Saturday was looking too far from Wednesday so I decided to make it a quick one.

Wrong decision because I did not only buy what was on my list, I bought some other things that were not on the list and I ended up overshooting my budget.

But you know the craziest thing, somehow I just could not put down any of the extra stuff I bought because they all looked appealing, more like life-saving. I didn’t understand why, I was just so convinced I needed them and so I bought them. As I drove home, I looked forward to eating many of the things I bought as all of them were edibles.

Fast forward to when I got home, I ate my dinner and sat down to do some dream work and totally forgot about the things i bought that i had planned to munch on. Minutes later, my help brought the bag to me and as I went through the things I bought, I suddenly realised that all the things I bought with much enthusiasm weren’t attractive to me anymore. I was looking at the biscuits and chocolates and wondering why on earth I got them and how I was going to eat them because I was seeing them for what they truly were – unhealthy junk.

It was then I realized that I bought all of them because they looked appealing and the reason they looked appealing was that at that point of purchase, I was hungry and anything that was edible looked like the next best thing, after salvation and a good marriage.

That made me overshoot my budget, on something I did not need, something I could now see clearly for what it actually is – junk! At the point I bought it, it didn’t matter what it was, what mattered was my perception of it – an object of great satisfaction for my crying stomach. I was thinking of my stomach- No! I was thinking through my hungry stomach and I made stupid decisions. At that point in time, my sense of judgement was warped. Hunger, warped my sense of Judgement.

Hunger is so serious that the adjective used to describe it is ravenous. You know what ravenous means? It means voracious; something close to wolfish.

The idea of it sounds scary. But that’s what hunger does to you. Especially if it’s been left unattended to for so long. Hunger warps your sense of Judgement and makes what would otherwise have been forbidden, appear accepted. Hunger can make you see yellow as gold and black as grey.

Hunger is so strong it has the power to channel your thinking mechanism from your mind through the organ where the hunger is resident; just like it channeled mine from my head through my stomach.

So, have you been thinking of.., sorry, have you been thinking through any of your organs lately?? Could it be that the decisions you’re currently making that aren’t helping you is because you’re thinking through your love-hungry heart, wondering how you will survive without a relationship or without that person and because of that, you’re eating junk?

Are you thinking through your sex organ so much that the scriptures in red about fornication and adultery are beginning to look pinkish white and the lines are blurring..

Are you thinking through your desire for fame so much that you’re ready to do anything or step on anyone to become that image of yourself you’ve conceived

Or could it be that you’re so power hungry that innocent people around you pay for stuff they know nothing about, just because you want to show

What are you hungry for? What is driving your decisions? What is the reason you’re doing what you’re doing? If you had a full stomach of your desire, would you still do what you’re doing now? What are you filling up yourself with? Junk or real food?

Never go shopping when you’re empty. Everything will appear as the solution you need and this is not even about shopping at a supermarket, it’s about living life everyday. That day I learnt that you’ll never make the best decisions when you’re hungry. That day, I understood why a lot of people make the wrong choices when they desperately need something.

The worst time to shop is when you’re hungry. That’s what happens when someone is desperate to get married. You’re hungry for marriage and in that instant, any guy will look appealing enough because your standards are lowered. When you’re hungry for attention, you’ll crave just anyone’s time. You’ll lower your standards for what you want.

What have you been craving lately? How desperately do you want it? I want you to take a break and critically look at what is driving you? Don’t allow your desires make you settle for less than God’s best for you. A whole life is ahead of you, don’t short-circuit yourself with short term gratifications. Decide for yourself what you want based on the life God has called you to live and stay on that, no matter how intense the pressure gets. The truth is that pressure will rise. People will talk. Time will be on the move but it’s what you have agreed with God on, based on His word, that will be your reality. Life answers to what is inside of you

Don’t go shopping on empty. You’ll make wrong decisions based on the cravings you feel

How did your week / day go?

PS: my book is out and the rave about it is so phenomenal. You can find out more about it here and you can order for a copy here or on Okadabooks

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Loving you still

Aijay Ufomadu

….Live Awake

Sometime ago, I experienced struggles, real struggles in trying to put my life together and bring something fruitful out of it. It wasn’t that I didn’t have dreams, I did and for some of those dreams, I had clarity but I was struggling, struggling to go through each day working on my dreams and that affected me on some very deep level because I didn’t want to get to 80 and discover I still had a lot to do with little or no time. So I knew I had to wake up. I had to find a way to make my life and dreams work.

I listened to inspirational tapes and attended motivational seminars and the likes and i came back more frustrated and confused than I cared to admit. Everyone is gingering for us to fulfill our dreams, very few are teaching you how to do that practically. I mean, I know I must fulfill my dream and ‘get to the grind’ and work it all out and all the works but what happens when I have this crazy unexplainable tiredness that won’t let me do anything past my jobtime?

What happens when I have huge financial responsibilities and my dreams still need money but I can’t save much because my money is needed everywhere?

What happens when I need an MBA but the last time I checked, LBS was charging millions that I don’t have to pay?

What about the other day when I prayed and prayed for something but I didn’t get results, results I needed for breakthrough on my dreams?

Ok. I’m in ministry but this turf is much tougher than I thought and all these ‘get in the grind’ talks ain’t helping me.

Me, I’m a wife and mum, and you could even be a husband and dad, we are also professionals or entrepreneurs, schedules are tight and it’s either we pursue our dreams at the expense of family or we focus on family and forget our dreams.

There are endless questions, real problems, life issues and challenges that people are facing on the journey to fulfilling their dreams and these challenges require answers, not just anwsers, answers one can tailor to the specific life season they are in and produce results.

This is by no means talking down on ‘getting in the grind.’ – No. But a whole lot goes into making that grind work, a whole lot than what we just see on the internet. We want to get results but it’s looking like a ‘long thing’

I mean, who is tired of getting tired

Who is tired of being at one place, circling a mountain over and over again? Raise your hands

Who is frustrated and confused because they’ve tried to ‘get in the grind’ but the grind is grinding them to pieces, they don’t even want anymore?

Who has plain given up?

Judging by the vast information and resources we have on pursuing our dreams, we ought to have more successes today than we actually have when compared to the world’s population. The question is, what is happening?

I’ll tell you. There is a mix behind the ‘the grind’ that people aren’t getting. It isn’t that they aren’t motivated or fueled to pursue their passion, it is that somewhere along the line, the mix is getting twisted and hindering their works if not stopping them all together. They are putting in so much but getting so little in return, compared to their input.

SO!!

Enter !!

Optimize Your Life – The Book.

Life issues most times require practical solutions and this book was written to provide practical answers to all the questions and challenges expressed above; those and many more.

I know they say that if you’re truly willing, you’ll find a way, if you’re not, you’ll find an excuse. But for you, you have not have found a way, not because you’re not willing but because you’re overwhelmed. You don’t even know where to start from. You’re not giving yourself an excuse, you’re just plain tired.

Don’t worry, I get. I know what it feels like to be at that point when you literally just want to give up but for me, the fear of getting to 80 and still having dreams unfulfilled kept me searching for answers I wasn’t getting from most of the talks and books I’ve come in contact with.

And that’s why I wrote this book. I don’t want you to get to the near-end of your life and experience an even greater frustration because you didn’t fulfill all God sent you to do. See, on that glorious day, far ahead in the future, when you’re ready to go back to your father in heaven, there is a joy you’ll feel knowing that you’re leaving empty! And that God will tell you ‘well done,’ not ‘well?’

Based on sound biblical principles which most self-help books these days omit, this book will start you on a journey to building a tailor-made structure that is specific to any life season you’ll get into, a structure from which you can launch out and fulfil your dreams.

I can’t promise that this book will answer all your questions or heal all your wounds because it’s not the Bible. But I can promise you that this is that book you’ve been looking for a long time now to give you more clarity; that information you’ve been seeking to understand some concepts; that insight you need to connect the dots.

Available on November 1, 2018, first as an Ebook on Okadabooks. Pray. Prepare your heart. Anticipate the release. A force sent by God is about to hit your heart and it’s coming from the pages of a book designed by God to wake you up to Him and make you ALIVE to the World!!

You’re here for impact.

You’re here as a solution.

Please do not give the devil another day of your life because you feel clueless, overwhelmed or for whatever reason!

You have a part to play in making the world beautiful, get on stage and make that happen!

See you November 1, 2018.

Pre-Order options are available for the hard copy and this comes with some bonuses which include but are not limited to; early bird discount and free pass to optimize-your-life workshops which will hold across major cities in Nigeria, and who knows, maybe outside Nigeria too.

To pre-order, please click here or pre-order on bit.ly/optimizeyourlifebook.  Kindly note that the ebook will be available on Okadabooks for now, the next site is kobo books and a couple of others, which I’ll definitely let you know.

Looking forward to hearing from you

I Celebrate You!!

AijayUfomadu

……Live Awake